Life

9 years ago today…

my grandmother died, she died on my father’s birthday, 2 weeks after my 16th Birthday in 1998.

I miss her like crazy

When I was really young, my dad travelled on business alot and my mom was still at University, so my grandmother would look after me during the day, I’d bake cakes with her and sit in the garden playing with the dogs. When we moved to Kuwait & Singapore, we used to chat on the phone every week. I’d tell her about my week, about my school and any other gossip.

She never saw me graduate from High School, or from University. She’ll never see me get married or see her great grandchildren, but she lives inside my heart and I couldn’t and will never forget her.

It was during this time 9 years ago that I was over on summer vacation from school in Kuwait, we were supposed to do back on the April 15th, but on the night of April 12th, she had a sore stomach and went to bed early. She thought she had indegestion so took a few pills to ease her pain. During the night, she was still ill so an emergency doctor was called out, he just prescribed medicine for her and told her to rest. Later on in the day of April 13th, an ambulance was called after another doctor was called and he said my grandmother had a heart attack during the night.

We all rushed to the hospital, they made up wait in a small room and didn’t tell us anything. Finally they let my grandfather and mom into her room, but not me… I was too young to go into ICU. Everything seemed fine for the rest of the day, she was resting and her vital signs were normal. They told us to go home

At 9am on April 14th 1998, I picked up the house phone. My grandfather was in the garden, my mom at the supermarket. It was the nurse instructing me to gather everyone and rush to the hospital ASAP. Things weren’t looking good.

They lied.

When we got there, she was already dead. She died at 8:20am, but they didn’t want to tell us over the phone.

I never got to see my grandmother, the last time I saw her was seeing her getting rushed off in an ambulance.

No one would let me see her and that still upsets me til this day.

I loved her, I wanted to see if she was okay, I wanted to say goodbye

But I never did!

I never got to say goodbye

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9 Comments

  • Reply
    D
    April 14, 2007 at 2:37 am

    I’m sorry to hear that
    I’m sure she’s in a better place

  • Reply
    mar
    April 14, 2007 at 7:40 am

    i miss my grandma too. she died of cancer. i was 7.

  • Reply
    Marzouq
    April 14, 2007 at 9:24 am

    I’m sorry for your loss, and I know she was happy talking to you!

  • Reply
    Jackie
    April 14, 2007 at 3:10 pm

    I agree with Marzouq she was happy talking to you, I have this relationship with my current grandmother and I don’t want to ever think of her not being able to see my wedding or even my kids, I guess I should start working on those right? :P

    But I know the feeling of losing a grandparent, I lost Mom’s Mother on my sisters birthday in 2002 and it sucked, although I wasn’t that close to her at all but I felt sad seeing my mom cry that day and you can’t do anything really.

    In the end, I am sure she’s in a better place inshalla.

  • Reply
    NoNoWa
    April 14, 2007 at 5:33 pm

    I understand how u feel. My grandma lived in the USA, and I was here in Kuwait with my family, so I never got to see her. She was my idol as I was growing up- i love her so much. She played a big part in raising me, cuz my mom was always working.
    Anyway, I was calling to tell her that I was geting married- March 14. I was so happy, and excited- I just couldnt wait to hear her voice. But nobody answered the phone, so I called my Aunt, and she told me the bad news- My grandma had passed away on Febuary 14, 2001.(She had heart disease, skin cancer and lung cancer.) Exactly a month before the day I was to be married.
    Nobody called and told us anything and i just couldnt understand why- we have family there, Aunts, Uncles, Great Aunts, friends and my biological father lives there, too. But no calls, and that hurts me until this day. Nobody seemed to care about her only grandaughter or her youngest daughter, but I know that she looks down at me from above- enshallah. And she is in peace now

  • Reply
    Missy
    April 14, 2007 at 9:43 pm

    awww :(

    sorry for ur los.. ur word are touchy..I got teary :'(

  • Reply
    Missy
    April 14, 2007 at 9:44 pm

    words*

  • Reply
    ananyah
    April 14, 2007 at 10:04 pm

    Thank you everyone so much, this post was really hard to write and I was actually crying at the end of it.

    Jackie, I cried for a month after her death. I just couldnt handle the fact she was gone :( I even missed my exams @ school.

    Nonowa, I’m so sorry 4 ur loss too! It must have been hard for your mom as well but I’m sure she is looking fown at you & was looking at u on ur wedding day *hug*

    Missy, tell me about it!

  • Reply
    Lulu
    April 15, 2007 at 3:02 am

    I miss my grandma so much it hurts to this day..i feel ya..except in my situation i could’ve saw her but i chose not to..i couldn’t handle seeing her in pain and saying good bye..everytime i think about her now its as if my heart gets sqeezed..It’s great u can write about it..Enshallah all our loved ones who passed away are in a better place.

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